I try to be nice. Really, I do. But one aspect I have trouble with is letting go. I am a professional grudge-holder. It's true. Wrong me once, and I have serious difficulties getting over it. Especially if it involves someone being not-nice. It's like I'm a Niceness Avenger! I still talk about how my teenage arch nemesis threw little crumpled pieces of paper in my hair during English class.
So those of you who stopped by here on Friday night might have seen a post from me regarding my plea for votes, saying how I was going to throw in the towel because another contestant seems to be involved in foul play. (I eventually deleted it.) All weekend it consumed me. I even had a dream that I tracked this girl down and asked her why she's doing this. I'm crazy, I know.
Eventually it became less about winning and more about this other girl NOT winning. Ms. Nice versus Ms. Shady. If you want to see me being not-so-nice, read my vent here.
But you know what? I need to get over it.
Today's Assignment: Let it Go
What good is stressing about it doing me? None. It's just giving me bad sleep, headaches, and chest pains. Over something so silly! Why do I care what someone else is doing? Obviously she must want to win very badly, and maybe she doesn't have all of the luxuries that I do, and this trip would be an amazing experience for her. So she's doing whatever she can to win. Or maybe I really wouldn't have a great time because it will be too hot or too crowded or too much of a hassle, and the universe is protecting me from that. There are many ways to look at the bright side!
In fact, I'm still amazed at how many of you have rallied behind me! So many people have voted and even encouraged other people to vote. It really warms my heart to see that support from you all! So really, as cheesy as it may sound, I'm already the winner! Come on, my nice army is giving an alleged rule-bender a run for her money! How cool is that?!
Don't get me wrong. I'm still going to try. If you haven't voted yet and you'd like to, I'll take all the help I can get! It might not do any good, but at least I'll give it my best shot....legitimately.
But in the meantime, I'm going to let it go. I'm not going to have any more anger building inside of me. In fact, I feel better already! So, do you guys hold grudges? Do you still obsess over something that happened years ago? I'd love to hear your story! Maybe telling it will help you let go!
18 comments:
I am bad at holding on to "stuff" also. So I try to take a deep breath and I recite, "Yoda Yoda Yoda" to myself, a close my eyes and see calm deep blue ocean.
Yes the Yoda is strange, but got it from a girlfriends soon. He didn't say Yoga, he said Yoda and it was to funny!
I will try to let it go with you!!
Haha! Okay, that makes me smile! I'm borrowing your "Yoda Yoda Yoda" mantra! :)
Great post! Great work, awareness and growth. This is the kind of thing that I mean by thriving instead of just surviving. Now...if I didn't struggle with it so much myself. Ah well, it's a process.
Good for you--I also had a grudge once--when I finally let go I was amazed at how my perspective changed. Go Yoda!!! (I also voted for you--you are giving her a run for the $$--good luck!)
It's SO important to let stress go. You're right -- what good does it do you? This isn't always easy to do, but it's a great assignment!
Grudges are such poison, but seeingly such a natural poison to swallow - I too find myself holding grudges without even realizing! My husband actually had to point it out to me one time that I was holding a grudge against someone. So it's great that you even recognize it!
It's so easy to hold grudges, all of us have in some way at some point in time. Thanks for being honest in this post - love this blog and hope you still have a shot at winning.
I've been holding a grudge over someone who I felt has wronged me deeply, personally. I don't really want to delve on details, and that might be considered badmouthing the person, but the thing is, every single day, the negative feelings just keep eating me up. I haven't even written that anywhere on my blog. Letting go might be a hard pill to swallow, but nobody said I can't chew on bit by bit everyday. Thanks for this week's assignment!
I find it sooo difficult not to hold grudges! The ridiculous thing is that I'm able to forgive people for serious wrongs (I suppose you have to have a close relationship with someone for them to hurt you badly), but I feel like I get permanently stuck on silly little things. I worked as a waitress for years, and I still replay in my mind all the rude things random customers have said. Enough! I'm totally trying the "yoda yoda yoda" mantra. It's too hilarious to pass up!
I missed the original plea but voted for you today!
What an amazing post! I tried to vote for you the first post but the site was locked up. After reading this one, I went right back and got my vote in. You certainly deserve this - and while it is totally cool about your acknowledgement of holding grudges, don't feel too bad. We have all been there and done that (and sometimes still do). Best wishes for winning the contest...but whether or not you do, please know that (as evidenced by all of us random folk out here reading your blog and commenting) you are having an effect on so many people and situations. That, in my opinion, is already a winning situation. (Still hopin' for the contest win, though) :)
Glad I'm not the only one. I'm horrible at this and just wish I could FORGET sometimes.
I know it's petty and stupid....I'm going to try hard to let it go.
Oh I had the same problem, time ago a girl make me terrible things.. I try to understand, but in some way, I couldn't forget it.. but the nice thing is that I realized one thing, the important is what I am, and not forget that..
I'm a nice person, but in the world you find all kind of people.. so you can't expect a nice answear.. but It's always better to give an smile, instead of being angry!!!...
This assignment is just what I need to help me let go of an ugly grudge that is sitting around, festering inside of me. YUK! Thank you for reminding me to be nice:).
Thanks for the great reminder to LET GO! I needed that. :)
Hey,
Someone said it before so I'll only reinforce here. Your picture is far better than the other girl's. No doubt about this.
In our eyes you won and that's what matters. There's always ways to cheat. She probably used some shady tricks. It's not that hard to create bogus email addresses.
Here's a french saying for you that applies to her: "A vaincre sans perils on triomphe sans gloire" That means winning without efforts is a triumph without glory.
Have a good day
Guillaume Besson
Voted for you gal! Good luck. Sounds like fun!!!
And I know grudges. It's an Irish family tradition! Sadly the one I bear the most anger towards is still around to open and re-open the old wounds. Hard to get over it when the person is family.
But as GI Joe says "Knowing is half the battle!" Keep working on it as will I.
I totally know what you mean about holding grudges. When something happens that upsets me, I just can't let it go. It just keeps going through my head over and over. I play out little scenerios in my head about things I would say. It's rediculous how I can't just let it go, even over something as silly as someone not waiting for their turn at a four-way stop. It's really nice to know that I'm not the only one like that. I'm slowing getting better though. Like anything else it's just one day at a time. Good luck!
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